


Trainhopping

by Kardinal1



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: 1980s AU, AU, AUs, Action, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universes, Drama, Multi, Romance, Runaways AU, idek, runaways - Freeform, teenage
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-04
Updated: 2014-02-19
Packaged: 2017-12-31 11:11:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1031017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kardinal1/pseuds/Kardinal1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren is a lost teenager just trying to reunite with his friends and fellow runaways, Armin and Mikasa, but an encounter in a quiet train yard causes a sudden change of plans.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Far from Home

Levi walked between the lines of rail cars that were stopped in the depot. The morning air was still chill from the night before, and the overhanging clouds dulled the light and threatened rain. The mid-sized German shepherd mix beside him pulled at his leash, obviously more eager to do the routine rounds than the man himself.

He didn't mind the early morning shifts at the train yard; it was usually quiet, no incoming trains or outside noises to bother him. He appreciated the silence. And he didn't mind getting up in the ungodly hours of the morning if he had to get it. Besides, it gave him most of the living day off.

There wasn't much to do, really. All he was doing now was the always-fruitless, nearly-pointless perimeter check that some of the more apathetic security guards usually skipped anyways, but he needed the walk. The office got cramped and claustrophobic after a while, the cheap wood-panelling walls pressing in, and the smell of the stuffy carpet stifled the air until it was nearly too thick to breathe. Levi needed to get out. He really wasn't expecting anything on this run, but he was nonetheless always prepared for it. It's always when you think you're good that something stabs you in your fucking face.

Just as he was about to turn back, something caught his eye from afar: a side car door was ajar on one of the trains. It was the one that had come it late last night (or technically, early this morning), carrying nearly nothing. Tugging at the leash, he guided the restless dog down the aisle with him towards the suspicious car, the gravel crunching under their feet.

As he approached, Levi could see that the door of the car was indeed open, slid well to the side with a very functional latch left undone. There wasn't anything on the inside of the car; most of the ones on this train were empty, being delivered to their destination so they could be packed full of cargo and sent off again to some other part of the country. An open door wouldn't normally set off any alarms, as Levi would guess it was just some lazy slackoff at the last stop not bothering to secure the cars of an empty train, but the door on the other side was also open. That was interesting; it told him that someone had been screwing around in there, probably a stowaway. Whoever it was could still be around, and whether they were dangerous or not Levi didn't know.

Coaxing the hound along, he climbed into the car and crossed the width in a few steps. The sound of his boots on the floor echoed inside the empty metal car. Levi urged the dog to quiet and slowly peeked out the other side. In the hazy morning light, he could clearly make out a the shape of a person bent over, trying to sneak around without making any sound on the gravel.

Seeing no immediate threat, Levi jumped out of the car, the dog following right after him.

“Hey!”

The figure spun around to look at him then bolted off between the cars. They looked young to Levi, probably just a kid, though one couldn't really base such an assumption on height alone. Without hesitation Levi sprinted after him, pausing only to release the dog from its leash.

“Go, Auruo!” He ordered, and the animal immediately darted ahead of him, sprinting enthusiastically across the gravel and underneath one of the trains to get at its prey.

Levi heard a shout and continued in that direction, hopping awkwardly over the hinge between two cars. Once he was clear he could see Auruo thrashing his head, his jaws clenched around a backpack while the culprit regained his footing a few feet away. _Dumb ass dog_ , he thought.

As the fleeing kid (he could tell it was definitely a kid now, probably a boy) tried to regain his footing, Levi pushed himself and charged forward, grabbing him by the collar and yanking him back. The kid's yelp was cut off as he fell backwards, straight into a vice grip from Levi, and he struggled wildly and yelped again when Levi tightened the hold.

“Calm yourself down, idiot, you're not going anywhere.”

The boy continued to struggle even as Levi lead him back to the security office. He seemed desperate, but years of police training meant Levi's hold was unbreakable.

Once there, Levi threw the kid into the tacky metal office chair facing his desk and leaned back against the door, blocking his only escape route unless he wanted a body full of of broken glass. Crossing his arms, he eyed the kid as he settled, defeated at least for now, into the chair.

“Alright, who are you, and why should I not turn you in to the police?”

The boy didn't answer. His eyes were trained on the ground, his hands clenched tightly in his lap.

Levi sighed. He wasn't expecting it to be easy, but he was not in the goddamned mood for it this morning.

“Fine by me, don't talk. There's your opportunity, but if you'd like to talk to an officer instead-”

The boy muttered something.

“Speak up, dipshit, so we can all hear.”

“I said, my name is Eren.”

Eren. That was a start. A start to what, Levi didn't know, and really didn't care, but it made things slightly more interesting.

“Alright, Eren,” he let the name sit on his tongue for a moment, “I'm not going to ask you why you were on that train, because the answer's pretty obvious...” Levi paused for a moment. Eren's eyes were still ferverently boring into the old carpet.

“Don't turn me in.”

Levi continued to stare, uninterested, waiting for him to continue.

“Don't turn me in,” he repeated, his eyes flicking up to the older man. It was more of a glare, but Levi could see it was not out of hatred but out of fear, like a cornered animal. “I...I don't want to go back. Okay? Please, just... let me go. I won't bother you. Just let me leave. You can forget about it.”

“Go back where?” Levi was a little more interested now.

Eren's grey eyes darted to the floor again. “Home.”

So he wasn't a wanted fugitive or anything, provided he was telling the truth. He was wired, Levi could tell, ready to fight for his freedom at a moment's notice. Despite his edgy front, Levi could tell from experience that Eren was more frightened than angry. Levid decided to prod a little more. “Where is home?”

Eren stayed silent this time. Levi wasn't going to get much out of him. The boy's breathing was unsteady. He was waiting to see what happened next.

“...'Kay.”

Eren looked up, confused. It took him a moment to recover from the sudden syllable. “Uh...'kay'? What's 'kay'?”

“'Kay, you can go.”

His face lit up. “For real?”

“Yeah,” Levi stepped away from the door, but as Eren moved to step out/leave, he stopped him again. “But...where are you going, exactly?”

“Well...I don't know.” Eren shrugged. “Wherever.”

“Wherever?” Levi scoffed. “Where's 'wherever' going to get you? Don't you have a plan or anything? A destination?”

Eren retreated again, going back to the careful, timid mode from before. “Not yet...”

No. He wasn't considering this. Something had hit Levi. What was that? Charity? Pity?

Come on. The brat was filthy and stank of sweat. Who knew what sort of diseases he was carrying? But he couldn't have been more than sixteen. Could Levi really let him walk out that door?

“If you need a place to stay, I _suppose_ I could let you crash on my couch for a couple days.” Eren's face lit up again. “Only a couple.”

Eren's smile suddenly wavered and Levi caught a hint of suspicion in his eyes.

“God, I'm not going to rape your mouth or anything. Chill the fuck out.”

Eren let out a nervous laugh and stared at Levi.

“...Come on, I still have to finish my shift.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This idea came to me in the middle of class one day, where the instructors seemed to be having a competition for the most clichéd project idea and the winner was 'throwing darts at a map'. It takes place in the Olden Days in the 1980s-ish, before cell phones and The Internets were really a thing.
> 
> Recommended Listening: **Life Less Frightening - Rise Against**
> 
>  
> 
> _I don't ask for much, truth be told I'd settle for a life less frightening_


	2. Looking For A Place To Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi brings home a lost and frightened puppy. Armin and Mikasa abuse the concept of free refills while looking for the puppy they lost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: Sexual Assault
> 
> Oof. Felt weird writing that part. Anyways, on with the story!

Levi's apartment wasn't far from the train depot. The twenty-minute walk was spent mostly in silence, which was occasionally interrupted by a passing car. The area didn't see much traffic; it was a bit out of the way really, and not very populous.

Levi stopped them outside a white two-story house. Even in this slightly better neighbourhood it stood out as nicer than the rest.

“You live here?” Eren asked.

Levi stared at him dumbly. _What. No. I just decided to break into this house._

Eren looked away hastily. He really was being too hard on the kid.

“I have the main floor,” Levi said nonchalantly as he walked through a living room and into the compact kitchen. “Someone else lives above me. I don't think anyone is living in the basement right now.” He took two glasses out of one of the cabinets and set them on the counter. “What's up with you? You can sit if you want.” He gestured loosely to the couch.

Eren was still standing awkwardly by the threshold. At Levi's invitation he hurriedly strode over to the white couch and sat stiffly on the edge of the seat. Levi was staring at him curiously, waiting for a response.

“Well, I...” Eren began hesitantly. He generally avoided other people like the plague, especially adults, for safety's sake. “As you can see, I'm not at home right now...”

Levi put a glass of water on the coffee table opposite him and sat down on the couch next to Eren, taking a sip from his own glass. “You don't have to tell me your life's story. But if I was planning on giving you up I would have done it already.”

Eren chuckled nervously again. _I'd be nervous too._ Kid was probably still wondering if coming here was a mistake. Still, there were worse places he could be. Eren hesitated, not knowing where to start.

“How long have you been on the run?”

That was as good a place as any. “Well, I think it's been.... five weeks? Around five weeks or so. Kinda hard to keep track of the date sometimes. This is the longest...We left at the beginning of October.” he thought. “It's about...what's the date today?”

“November twelfth”

“November twelfth. Wow.” He stopped to take a long, grateful swig of water from his glass.

“Who's 'we'?”

Eren's gaze darted to Levi, who was waiting for an answer. He put the glass back down on the coaster, overlapping the ring-shaped puddle that was already there.

“My friends and I left together. Armin and Mikasa. I got separated from them a little while ago, so I don't know where they are, but we have ways of finding each other.”

Levi nodded. “It's good not to be alone.” Absently, Eren wondered if Levi meant anything by that. Had he been alone once, too? Was he ever in Eren's tatty shoes, but without the company? He was probably getting ahead of himself.

“So what about you? You haven't said anything about yourself yet.”

Levi absently tapped the glass. “I work at the train yard, obviously. I live alone, obviously. I appreciate the laxness of it all.” His eyes wandered up to the ceiling.”I like reading. And horses. I used to be a police officer.” Eren's eyes widened.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Stressful.” His eyes glazed over a bit, remembering something from the past.

There was a silence again, and Levi looked at their empty glasses before collecting them and carrying them back to the kitchen. “I don't feel like cooking tonight, so let's go get take-out.” Eren's eyes lit up like a ravenous beast at the mention of food, so much so that Levi briefly wondered if perhaps he had brought a cannibal into his home and he was about to be murdered. “Wash yourself up first. You smell like shit.”

Eren practically sprinted down the hallway at the promise of food. Levi chuckled “I'll grab you some clean clothes 'cause from the look of your backpack you definitely don't have anything clean in there!” he called after him.

Just for a while, he said. Maybe the company wouldn't be so bad.

 

 

A single cup of coffee sat between two youths at AJ's Diner on a Tuesday afternoon. It was half empty with countless rings around the inside, the teens taking full advantage of free refills again and again, much to the chagrin of the staff. The two figures sat huddled, staring out the window in moot silence as they endlessly passed the mug back and forth between them. The first one, a boy, had a look of cautious doubt on his face as his eyes vigilantly patrolled the street for a sign of something. His blonde hair looked like it was in the awkward stage of growing out, where one couldn't really call it short, but neither was it long enough to actually do anything with. The girl opposite him had the same expectant look on her face, but more restrained, framed with shoulder-length jet-black messy hair. She spoke without turning away from the window.

“I don't think he's showing up.”

The boy sighed. He collected the notebook and pen lying next to him and deposited them in a faded red backpack.

“I think it's time to move on, Armin.”

Armin looked at her for a moment, then down at the coffee mug, defeated. “Yeah... do you have a sharpie?”

The girl rifled through her own worn backpack and pulled out a marker.

“I'll leave him a message, in case he does come through here.” Armin got up and gestured to the men's room. “I'll be right back, Mikasa.”

Mikasa nodded silently and returned to her post of staring out the diner window.

The men's room was dirtier than Armin expected, but what could one really expect from a seedy diner on the bad side of town? It smelled like a hobo grotto, and it didn't look much better. The mirror was cloudy, none of the doors were actually functional, and the tap dripped so much it was practically a stream. The light on the ceiling buzzed and occasionally flickered, leaving the room in complete darkness for half a second before coming back on and reassuring him that the world had not, in fact, vanished before his eyes.

_Good place to get murdered_.

Armin walked over to a spot next to the greasy mirror and brandished his sharpie.

 

_Eren,_

_Mikasa and I are moving on to the next town. We'll wait for you there._

_Missing you. We'll find each other eventually._

_Stay safe,_

_Armin_

 

Underneath it he scrawled the date. The boy stepped back to admire his handiwork. At least it was something.

Armin emerged from the washroom to see Mikasa standing by their table, ready to leave, and he noted the staff's satisfied looks as she handed him his backpack and they stepped out of the diner into the street.

The cold November wind found it's way through their light jackets and nipped at their skin, sending shivers through their bodies. Armin was used to the cold; his parents often forgot to pay the heating bills in their intoxicated stupor, but at least at home he could hide under a pile of blankets or saunter off to the library for a bit. Mikasa pulled her scarf up over her mouth and turned to him.

“How far is the next city?”

The one they were in now was decently small, more like an outgrowth of the bigger one a little bit farther on. Armin thought for a moment. “It's not too far. We should be able to catch a street tram or something. We just need to find the right route.” He looked around, noting the lack of public transit signs.”There's a station a little while down the road where we came from. How about I check that out and you go procure some munchies?”

Mikasa nodded. “Meet back here in an hour?”

“Sounds good. See you then.”

 

 

Mikasa sighed as she rifled through food market dumpsters again. Bigger stores, like the one she was currently pilfering through the dumpsters of, often threw food into the trash that was only a couple days after the expiry date. Unfortunately, places like that also just as often employed actual security guards to catch shoplifters, so here she was digging through dumpsters. It wasn't ideal, but it beat not eating at all.

Mikasa was so engrossed in her work that she didn't even hear him appear. She didn't hear the brute approach her from behind, until he was right behind her and she tried to scream but it was quickly muffled by a boorish hand covering her mouth as he turned her and slammed her against the wall. The blow stunned her long enough for him to grab her sluggish arms and pin them to the building above her, his thick trunk of a limb easily pinning both of her slender arms.

“Hey there, prettygirl,” the man breathed, his rotten breath warm and moist against her face as she tried to scream once more, but he shoved her hard against the wall again. “Keep quiet, or I'll break your fucking legs.”

Mikasa thrashed wildly but was still unable to break free. This shouldn't be happening. She should have had a warning. She should have been paying attention. She should have been able to floor this guy in a heartbeat, what were all those martial arts classes for anyways? What was she _doing_?

_-ohgodohmygodwhatohgodnononononoNO-_

She felt the blockage move away from her face, and she heard her cry for help briefly before it was muffled by his lips as he shoved his face in to fill the void left by his hand. She felt him thrust his tongue between her teeth and violate her mouth as reached up her shirt and groped her. She tried to turn her head away in disgust but she couldn't, he had her pinned down, and as he yanked at her belt with his free hand she felt herself beginning to sob.

Suddenly she sensed footsteps approaching rapidly from the direction of the street and through her tears she could make out a small figure in a black jacket. Was that Armin? Could it be? A split second later the brute on top of her fell back and bellowed in pain.

It was Armin ( _thank god_ ). The boy, pint-sized next to the massive man and in just as much shock as she was, leaped backwards and reached to grab Mikasa's wrist, dragging her out of her shock and forcing her into a run. As they sprinted away, she looked back only long enough to glimpse her assailant hunched over and still howling, Armin's red army knife sticking out of his back with the blade buried halfway into his ribs.

They didn't stop running until they were far, far away, passing many startled pedestrians before finally doubling over on the sidewalk.

It was a good five minutes before they could speak.

“Are you alright?” Armin panted.

Mikasa looked at him, looking back at her with expectant eyes, and a sob tore through her lips.

Armin moved to place his arms around her, and she recoiled momentarily before yanking her friend into a close embrace. She squeezed him hard, and he squeezed right back as she continued sobbing into his shoulder.

“Shh, it's alright, it's alright, it's over, he's gone... I'm here now...”

Her muffled weeping and his words of comfort echoed in the empty street for twenty more minutes as they held each other, both shaking, but not from the cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Mikasa :(
> 
> More characters will come in later, and I'll tag them as they come in. It seems only fair.
> 
> Reccommended listening: **Common People - Pulp**
> 
> _You will never understand how it feels to life your life with no meaning or control, and with nowhere left to go_


	3. If Only Shoplifting Were That Easy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren isn't familiar with 'mornings' and 'getting proper sleep'. All of Mikasa's best ideas come to her on the roof of an apartment complex while being chased by the police.

Eren wasn't usually a heavy sleeper, but three weeks on hard floors and bare mattresses built up a debt that needed to be collected.

At first, he didn't recognize where he was. Ceiling? Warm? _Comfortable_? When had that happened?

But yesterday came flooding back to him, gradually reasoning up his sense of calm. The rumble of the wheels lulling him to his first sleep in three days, waking up well after the train had already stopped, the security guard hunting him down and scaring the life out of him, the Chinese food... real food. A lot of food. At least four people's worth of food. So good...

“Get up, asswipe.”

Eren opened his eyes again, coming back to reality.

The apartment he was in reaffirmed that he had not hallucinated all of it. Spacious, perfect for one or two people, and clean as a whistle...just as he remembered. He heard dishes clanking and something sizzling, something that smelled _so good_.

He sat up from his current position of splayed across the couch and rubbed his eyes.

“Nice to see you're awake, finally.”

Eren turned to see a small, well-kept man hovering over the stove, with various other breakfasty implements cleanly arranged on the counter. Levi. His name was Levi.

“Eh?” Eren moaned, unable to form intelligent words just yet.

“I was beginning to think you'd slipped into a coma. You passed out pretty hard after dinner. Then again, you did eat enough for a fucking barn.”

Eren grunted, and Levi brought over two plates of food, setting them on the glass coffee table before going back and getting some glasses of orange juice.

“You've been very kind to me.”

Levi looked at Eren with his apparently perpetual look of disdain, waiting for something intelligent to come out of the boy's mouth.

“I mean, thanks...”

Levi chugged his orange juice and set upon his meal, expecting Eren to follow suit. They ate in silence, Eren surprised to find that eggs and bacon came in 'not disgustingly greasy'.

“When do you have to leave for work?”

Levi eyed him strangely. “I have the day off today. Otherwise, don't you think I would've left by now?”

Eren jumped up suddenly. “Shit! What time is it?!”

The boy looked around frantically before spotting a clock. 1:47. He yelled in exasperation. “Do you have a phone book?”

“What, you got somewhere to be?” Levi said doubtfully.

“No. Yes! Well,” Eren began his explanation. “Whenever me and Mikasa and Armin get separated, we have this way of finding each other.” Her scrambled as he pulled a fat yellow wad from a shelf. “At noon, every day, we wait for each other at the first diner that's listed in the phone book. It works well!”

“How do you even know what city the other's in?”

Eren's grin faded. “Er, well whenever we get separated we always stay put until we find each other, so it's always been in the same city... but last time, I made it onto the train in time, but Mikasa and Armin didn't...” Worry crossed his visage. It suddenly dawned on him that they could have been apprehended by now, and he could be alone. “That was two weeks ago.”

He broke out of his frozen state and rifled through the phone book. Levi noted his desperation.

The man sighed and stood up. “Well, we might as well check for today. What's the first listing?”

“...Adulla's.”

“Good. That's not far from here. Get dressed, we might still catch them.”

 

 

 

It had stopped raining by the time they got off the streetcar (overcrowded streetcars were a blessing to moochers) and Mikasa and Armin laughed in the fresh damp air, so good after being in the stuffy crowded car. The sky was still overcast, but it wasn't too late in the afternoon so the light wasn't that bad.

Mikasa inhaled, looking at her friend. Armin and Eren both had a way of elating her that she couldn't get from anything else. It had always been like that. She guessed it was just nice to know that somewhere in the cold, unforgiving wilderness of the endless buildings and strange faces, there was someone who truly, deeply understood her and cared about her, and would face all of whatever they had to go through together. They would be fine; they always looked after each other. She didn't trust anyone else in the world.

But Mikasa didn't quite know how to express all that, so she just called them her 'favourite idiots'.

“So what do you want to do?” She asked.

“Well we should probably find a phone booth and look up the next diner, for tomorrow.”

“Do you think we should actually buy food this time?”

“I wish, depends how cheap the menu is. I'm dying for a proper breakfast though-”

Armin was cut off as a passing walker made the mistake, intentional or not, of clipping Mikasa's shoulder. The girl spun around, her demeanor instantly turning from loving and friendly to absolute bloody murder.

The other person had turned around too, maybe to apologize, but he had stopped as soon as he saw Mikasa. He was about their age, wet brown hair, flushed pale skin and muddy pants. The two stared at each other, Mikasa's gaze really more of a glare daring the other to make a move. The guy looked more startled than angry, staring back at her with in confused fascination. Armin wondered if maybe he was touched in the head, to be looking at a potential murderer like that.

Armin stared helpless for a few tense moments in the silence, hoping he wouldn't have to break up another fight.

“The fuck you looking at?” Mikasa eventually spat. She stared another few moments, and, seeing that the man wasn't going to respond, she quickly turned on her heel and continued on her way.

Armin exchanged an apologetic look with the confused man before turning and scurrying after Mikasa, who was still walking away defiantly.

“You're vicious, you know. You don't have to pick a fight with everyone.”

“Don't tell me how to live my life.” She snapped.

The hurt look on Armin's face made her instantly regret it.

She grabbed his shoulder and shook it apologetically. “Ah, what say we grab some food, eh? You hungry?”

 

 

Armin waited under an awning across the street from the shop Mikasa was currently browsing. He looked up from his raggy, worn shoes and the little puddles of rain water on the ground and he could see her dark hair drifting through the aisles of candy and junk food. After a few minutes she ducked out the door and jaywalked towards him.

“All good,” she confirmed. “Even got us ice cream sandwiches!”

Sweet treats were always good news. Armin smiled heartily, but his eyes wandered back to the store.

“They saw you.”

“How do you know?”

“Because he's on the phone now. And he's looking at us.”

Mikasa turned back to face the store and sure enough the man at the counter was staring right at them while talking into the mouthpiece of a telephone.

Mikasa turned back to face Armin, unfazed. “We'd better go,” and they set off down the street.

Once they were out of sight Mikasa whipped two chocolate bars out that were wolfed down within seconds. Neither of them could remember the last time they'd had a proper meal.

“Twix bars are the best dinner,” Armin said sarcastically. “Do you think you could lift a three-course meal next time?”

Mikasa chuckled, but her mirth was cut short. Something, maybe instinct, told her to look behind her.

There, down the street in the direction they'd come from, a police car had parked, and judging by how the two officers stepping out of the car stopped looking around after spotting them Mikasa guessed it was time to make a quick exit.

“Guess our guy doesn't take kindly to being cheated,” she muttered, taking Armin by the wrist and dragging him into a run as one of the policeman shouted after them.

The two teens were very used to running away by now, but all the same the officer pursuing them seemed to be equally good at chasing. Every time they turned back to check, hoping he had given up or toppled over, he was still there despite both the fair distanced they had put between them and the constant twists and turns they made in an attempt to lose him.

Quickly ducking down an alleyway, they spotted a grimy fire escape climbing up the side of an apartment complex. Without thinking they leaped up the extended ladder and set off up the stairs together, Mikasa practically dragging Armin up the steel steps when he lagged behind.

They could hear the clanging steps of the officer as he started to climb beneath them, but they were already more than a couple flights ahead. Nonetheless they pushed to quicken their pace, reaching the top of the stairs right as Armin's lungs felt like they were about to combust inside his chest.

He stumbled forward, doubled over and panting, as Mikasa ran to door to the inner stairway. She yanked hard on the handle but the door stayed shut. _Of course_. Whipping her head around hastily, she ran to the other edge of the building and an idea graced her.

“Armin,” she called. “Armin, I have an idea.”

He ran up next to her, still breathing heavily. “What?”

Armin followed her gaze to the building across from them. A fire escape identical to the one they had just raced up stretched down the side of it.

“No...” he breathed. “We'll never make it!”

“Yes we will! We can,” insisted Mikasa. “We can't go back. I won't.”

“Would you rather be dead?”

“I'd rather take that chance!”

The policeman shouted behind them, only a few flights down from where they were. Mikasa backed up from the ledge, getting ready to jump.

“ _Mikasa!_ ” Armin hissed.

But she was already running, each step bringing her closer and closer to the edge of the building and closer to a potential six-storey drop to her death. Her mind slowed down as she ran, each moment stretched out by the surge of adrenalin, but her movements were fluid, exact, deliberate, until she was leaping off the ledge, and for two seconds she felt the thrill and nausea of weightlessness before clanging hard against the railing of the metal stairs half a story lower than before.

She swung herself effortlessly over the rail, landing with two feet on the platform, and turned back around to face the other building.

“Come on, Armin!”

He stared at her in horrified disbelief. Did she not realized what she had just done? It took him a moment to snap out of it, looking first at her and back at the fire escape behind him. The policeman hadn't reached the top yet, but from the sound of the sluggish steps reverberating through the metal structure, his paunchy form would appear before long.

He looked back at Mikasa in wide-eyed terror. _I can't_ , he mouthed, as she held out her hand.

“Come on, Armin!” she coaxed. “You can! I know you can! I'm here, I'll catch you!

Armin took a deep breath, still shaking his head, before he backed away out of sight, reappearing a moment later and leaping from the edge.

He hadn't gotten as much speed as her. He only got halfway across before his trajectory started to dip and he fell, his stomach turning first from the weightlessness and then from abject terror as Mikasa flew higher above him, and for a moment neither of them were sure he was going to make it across.

Mikasa reached out farther beyond the railing but her fingers barely brushed Armin's as he plummeted below her.

He landed hard, a full story below her, smashing his jaw against the handrail and barely managing to grab ahold of the bars, the rest of his body hanging precariously fifty feet above the ground.

“Mikasa,” he squeaked. The girl flew down the stairs as fast as she could, her friend's grip loosening even as she hurried to down to him.

She slammed her hands down on his arms and hauled him up, pulling him up by his sleeves, his back, and finally his jeans as they tumbled down on top of each other before regaining their composure again. Armin was simply amazed that he was alive, but Mikasa was already looking for their next destination. She spotted an open window another floor below them and gestured before tugging Armin along down the steps and slipping inside.

The room was dim and homey. Armin and Mikasa hurriedly pressed themselves against the walls, listening closely to the sounds outside.

They leaned back and listened to the commotion outside as the police officer searched the roof and called for them, promising forgiveness and retribution, kids, if you'd just calm down and come out, _we're not going to hurt you..._

It was all empty words they had heard before, though, and there was no persuading them. The words slid right off them like water droplets on a bird's feathers. They held their breath as he leaned over the edge of the building and looked for any sign of the two, before calling down to his partner and heading back to the stairs.

Mikasa and Armin breathed a sigh of relief.

“Mikasa Ackerman, you are a fucking _lunatic_.”

She laughed, but her laughter was suddenly cut off. She was staring at something in the quiet apartment. Armin followed her gaze.

It seemed that in the suspense they'd failed to notice that they weren't the only ones in the room.

A young man sat against the wall opposite them, gaping at them, looking very confused and possibly just a little offended at the sudden intrusion. Armin noticed the two-toned undercut and recognized him as the guy Mikasa had been fronting earlier when they'd gotten off the streetcar. The three stared at each other in a stunned silence, waiting to see which one of them was going to speak first.

“...What the-”

“Shut up!” pleaded Armin. He could still hear the policeman on top of the other building. They continued their stunned silence, tense and still.

“-Jean?” A voice called from deeper inside the apartment, looking for a response it had yet to receive.

The source of the voice, another young man, stepped in the doorway. He was tall and his freckled face was innocent-looking and kind. He stopped almost as soon as he entered, as soon as he noticed Armin and Mikasa crouching by the window. He turned in confusion to look at his companion, who seemed just as lost as he was.

Mikasa was still listening to the sounds outside. The awkward tension in the room was bad, but she didn't want to risk revealing themselves too early, or all their hard work and death-defying would be for nothing.

“Jean...” their newest addition whispered to the first man. “...what's going on?”

“That's an excellent question, Marco.” He said slowly, not taking his eyes off Mikasa.

“Mikasa,” Armin said just loud enough for only her to hear. “I don't hear them outside any more.”

“Go.” She spoke louder, loud enough for everyone to hear this time. She didn't care. Armin carefully climbed out the window into the daylight. Without breaking her staring match with the first standoffish dumbass, she quietly followed suit, disappearing with her friend down the steel stairs.

As they ran, the adrenalin rush of the situation faded, letting it sink in just how close they had come to utter failure. Then the awkwardness sank in, but Mikasa wasn't really a fan of being awkward. Armin could handle that.

Just another day, she thought, another day in the grinder. They would make it. They had each other regardless of any temporary separation.

_But it probably would be best if we didn't jump off any more buildings._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Recommended listening: **Paper Wings - Rise Against**
> 
>  
> 
> _You can catch up with yourself, if you run..._


	4. Payback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren is beginning to get worried that he can't find his friends. He wants to show Levi that he's grateful for his help and support, but he doesn't exactly know how.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I totally realized that I should be giving thanks to my friend Aillil for proofreading all of this. You guys should check him out he writes some good smut
> 
> (Thanks man :) )

  It had been a week and there was still no sign of Armin or Mikasa. Every day, Eren went to Adulla's diner on Liberty Avenue, arrived a quarter hour before noon, bought a drink (Levi insisted on giving him some change, so that he 'wouldn't look like a broke-ass fucking bum hanging around outside all day'), sat by the window, and waited. He waited and waited for hours with no sign of his friends. Finally defeated, he would trek back Levi's house, bowing his head and trying to repress the ball of anxiety that grew in his stomach every time he had to walk back alone.

And there was Levi. Eren didn't know what to think of Levi. The solitary man had let Eren into his home and had yet to ask anything in return. Eren didn't get it. He'd never run into someone before who would readily offer such kindness and who didn't want something back. When Eren had first come back with the older man from the train yard, he suspected... no, was certain that there was something Levi wanted. He kept waiting for him to say something, or to make some sort of indication as to what it was, but none ever came. There must be something. There had to, right? Eren knew he had little to offer, but there were always favours. Or... services. Eren shuddered at the thought. The streets were a dangerous place to be alone. Plenty of people chomping at the bit to take advantage of a lone teenager... Eren hoped Levi was different.

He seemed like he genuinely wanted to help Eren. Or, at least, didn't mind giving him a bit of a helping hand. Though it had only been a week, each day had shown Levi to be someone who was caring despite his apathetic demeanour. He was abrasive yet still kind... or at least he seemed to be to Eren.

Still, Eren found himself growing attached to the man. He knew it could just be a facade, but all of the positives made Eren want to overcome his distrust. That part of him grew more and more as the days went by. There was an intense admiration growing for Levi, a feeling that was unfamiliar to Eren. What was it, friendship? Respect?

Eren shook his head. He didn't know how to label his feelings for Levi. He just liked Levi. Levi was nice. And Eren found himself _wanting_ to pay him back for it, even though there was little he could do.

Today was the same as most days. Levi was home by the time he finished his trek, his shift at the train yard having been relieved by a bored high school dropout who was, in Levi's opinion, far too eager to play hero. Eren sauntered through the door, hunched over and beaten, and sighed inwardly as he slumped down on the couch.

“Oh, don't look so run-down.” Levi sneered. “You look like you've given up already. Have you really come so far and gone through so much shit to let the situation beat you?

Eren sighed. “No...”

“Then have a little faith in your comrades.”

Levi's speech was cut short by a knock at the front door. Eren hadn't noticed anyone on his walk back, but then again he hadn't really been paying attention. He watched as Levi got up to answer the door.

“Levi!”

The person at the door squealed loud enough to startle Eren. They was bespectacled and seemed about the same height as him, with mid-length brown hair that was pulled back into a messy ponytail. Eren got the impression that they were somewhat important regardless of their paint-covered clothes. They held a wide, rectangular box, wrapped in delicate paper. It took Eren a moment to recognize it was a gift.

Levi didn't look quite as thrilled to see the person. “Hello, Hanji.”

“How are you? How's work? Have you beaten anyone up lately?”

“Unfortunately not. No one stupid enough, or drunk enough. How are the chickens?”

“Great!” They grinned. They were a very smiley person. “Franco and Mar keep fighting though. They're real bastards, scaring ol' Debbie like that. Poor Debbie... I swear one of these days they're just going to scare her right to death!” Hanji leaned into the doorway as she noticed Eren, eyeing the boy. “Who's this? New friend?”

“Yeah. Sort of. He's staying with me right now.”

“Oh.” They said curtly. Their eyes slowly crawled back to Levi's face. “Does he like puzzles?”

“Hanji, no.”

“Anyways!”

They thrust out their arms, handing Levi the package they had been holding.

“Happy Birthday!”

“My birthday is next month, Hanji.”

“I know! I'm going to be away though, so I'm dropping it off early.” They grinned. “I hope you like it!”

Levi shook it and it rattled dully. He looked up at Hanji with zero amusement. “Is it a jigsaw puzzle?”

They giggled. “I know you don't really do them, but I enjoy them so I hope you do too.”

Levi sighed, but Eren swore he saw a ghost of a smile tug at the corner of his mouth

“Thank you, Hanji.”

“You're welcome! And you can ask me for help any time!” They smiled. “I'll be by next week to pick up your rent.”

“I could just mail it, you know.”

“Oh, but that's so impersonal! And I only live a few streets away.”

Levi shrugged. “Okay then. Up to you.”

“Well, I'll be off. I hope you like your gift!” They said again.

Levi thanked them once more and shut the door. He put the box on the glass table and sat down next to Eren, apparently lost in thought.

“Who was that?” Eren asked.

“That's Hanji, my landlord.”

“You don't seem to like her very much.”

“Hm? No, I like Hanji.”

“So that's a...woman?”

Levi shrugged. “Hanji doesn't care what you call 'em.”

“Oh.” Eren said simply. Well that was pretty cool.

“Oh! And...” he looked at Levi quizzically. “...chickens?”

“Hanji keeps chickens in their back yard, because they are insane.”

“Isn't that illegal?”

“No, actually. Police haven't had any complaints yet, though.” He lowered his voice to a mutter. “Well, not about the chickens...”

Levi reached over to the table again to grab a book, flipping it open to where a bookmark proudly displayed his progress. “No plans tonight. We'll order pizza, I guess. We'll try again tomorrow.” He looked at Eren, noting his disheartened look at the mention of his quest. “Don't worry. We'll find them. Stop looking so dour.”

Eren smiled weakly. He really did want to do something for Levi.

 

 

 

 

Levi's door barely creaked as Eren pushed it open. It was late (or early, he guessed at this point) and the young man did his best to silence his steps as we walked through the darkness. Levi stirred at the creaking hinges, the only indication to Eren being the rustling of blankets and the dark shape that could be a person turning to look at the doorway. He squinted at Eren through the darkness.

“What is it?” he asked groggily. Eren felt a little bad about waking him, but hopefully he would be able to make it up to him.“Did you have a bad dream? Did you piss on my couch or something?”

Eren wordlessly continued around to the other side of the bed and hesitated momentarily before slipping under the covers. He was grateful the darkness made it impossible for Levi to see the redness on his face.

The other man was still poised to look at him, but Eren couldn't make out a clear expression in the dark. His stomach felt knotted, and he could feel the anxiety trail down his arms and pool in his hands. He didn't know if Levi felt the same way, if this was what he wanted. Eren didn't even know why he was doing this, but he couldn't think about that right now.

Levi's head eventually flopped down onto the pillow facing away from Eren, apparently too tired to deal with the boy.

How to do this... Eren wasn't sure what to do. He'd been staying with Levi for a while now, right? The man must want something. In Eren's experience, people don't do things for nothing. He knew this when he decided to stay, knew that there would be some sort of proposition or debt, but Levi hadn't said a thing about anything like that. But Eren was convinced there was some price to pay. There was a reason Levi had let him stay. He hoped to God he was doing this right. What exactly was he trying to do? Whatever it was, it was too late to turn back. He had to follow through with it now.

The cover's weight on him was comforting, and he took brief solace in it's reassuring embrace. Steeling himself, not breathing, he began to reach out, tense anticipation shooting through his body as he wrapped his arm around Levi's waist, pulling him closer...

Levi jumped out of the bed immediately. Eren cringed, waiting for the barrage of hostilities, name-calling and maybe even some physical abuse, but nothing came. Levi's shadowed figure was facing him but his features were indiscernible and no matter how hard Eren's searched wide-eyed for some sign, there was none.

“What are you doing?”

His voice was composed. What was that he detected? Fear? Suspicion? Disgust? Arousal? Eren couldn't tell, and it was eating him up inside.

He was too scared, too stunned to answer. He saw Levi turn to the door and start walking, and he couldn't move as he watched him leave.

Eren sat in the darkness, the minutes flowing together indistinct as he attempted to recover. He laid himself down delicately, pulling the quilt around him in a warm cocoon, his fists clutching the blanket so tightly it felt like the bones in his fingers would snap. His breathing was under control, but Eren still struggled to calm his heart as he cursed himself. He closed his eyes, trying to dispel the one thought that was dominating his mind.

_What the fuck did I do?_

 

 

 

 

The blinds were still drawn when Eren woke up. As he stared at the slits of light on the wall his foggy mind wondered where he was. This fleeting moment of bliss, spent floating in ignorance as he enjoyed the silence and the soft bed, hardly lasted before the dreadful memory of last night hit him like a freight train.

What had he been thinking? He shouldn't have acted. Levi would have made a move first, if that was what he wanted. Eren shouldn't assume things, shouldn't be so afraid, shouldn't be so eager to please people. Levi was the first man he'd met who had treated him with compassion and respect, who had gone out of his way to help Eren, and now he'd lost that. Stupid. Stupid stupid _stupid fucking stupid idiot..._

Now he had to deal with his mistakes. He had done it before and he could do it again, but it still took all his energy to will himself up.

He had been hoping Levi was still asleep, but as he emerged from the hallway he could see he had no such luck. He hurried to the front door with long strides, grabbing his bag in one swift motion, without looking back to see what he would be leaving behind.

“Eren, wait.”

The boy stopped. In his head he calculated how many split seconds it would take him to get to the door, and just how valuable each of those fractions were in comparison to hearing Levi out.

“Let's talk about this.”

_Let's talk about how you fucked up. Let's talk about how you're a perv, and a queer, and how you should just get the fuck out._

It took all of Eren's strength to turn and face Levi instead of bolting out the front door.

“You don't have to leave.”

Eren eyed him warily, even though the words should have soothed him. He looked genuine, choosing his words carefully.

“But I don't...” Levi continued. “I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything. I didn't bring you here as a bargain or a cheap fuck. So don't think you have to do anything like that for me.”

 _But what if I want to?_ Eren quieted the thought and carried on instead. “It's just... I'm sorry.”

Levi waved away the apology. “You don't have to be sorry. You're better than that. You should treat yourself better than that.”

The kind words caught Eren off-guard, but if Levi noticed his surprise he didn't make it known. “And... how old are you, anyways?”

“I'm sixteen.” said Eren. He was still recovering from before. “I'll be seventeen in a couple months...”

“Yeah, see, don't you think that'd be a little... weird? I mean, I'm twenty-seven. Bit of an age gap, there.”

Levi punctuated his statement by turning around and striding to the apparently finished coffee machine, not expecting a response.

“Well...” began Eren. “I always thought age didn't really matter much, as long as you could relate. Love is love, right? If you love each other, it shouldn't really matter how old you both are.”

Eren wasn't quite sure why he'd said that. Levi had his back turned to him now. He poured the coffee and added two sugars into each before twirling around and bringing one to Eren. Even without a response Eren was grateful. Levi hadn't even seemed weirded out about the fact that they were both guys, which was refreshing.

He sighed and his lips twitched into a small smile, finally allowing the relief to flow into him. He was eternally, eternally grateful that out of all the possible outcomes, he had been blessed with one that didn't end with him lost and alone again. How he had ever found such luck after a lifetime of trial and misfortune escaped Eren, but he wasn't about to ask questions.

He put down his bag and walked over to help Levi with breakfast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow Eren you're not very good at seduction are you.
> 
> I'm going to start adding some listening at the end of each chapter. I've added some to the earlier chapters but I'll list them here:
> 
> 1\. Life Less Frightening - Rise Against  
> 2\. Common People - Pulp  
> 3\. Paper Wings - Rise Against  
> 4\. Animal - Against Me!
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> _Like an animal, these thoughts have gone beyond my control_


	5. Camping is Terrible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Winter is coming and the streets are starting to get cold at night. Armin and Mikasa need a plan, and so does Eren if he doesn't find his friends soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update x_x holiday season (aka exam season) hit with a vengeance. I hope this chapter makes up for it! I'll be trying to update a lot more regularly now.

 They made their bed on a park bench that kept them off the cold ground but still covered by the nearly bare autumn trees.

It had been a long night, one of the coldest they'd had to endure so far. It was the kind of cold that Mikasa always inevitably woke up to in the middle of the night, cool with the slow metabolism of sleep, and she'd instantly wonder how she could have possibly slept in such an environment. She'd open her eyes in a daze of confusion, alarmed at first, but would relax after realizing that they were in no danger. Disoriented in the dark, she'd manage to call reality back to her upon seeing the distant streetlights, and she would remember that they had fallen asleep outside in the dark. She could feel the icy air cradling her and the cold body next to hers, shivering in his sleep, and maybe it was just the ether clinging to her but she could swear she heard his clenched teeth chattering.

She would shiver and curse herself for waking up in the first place and wonder for a long time how she would ever fall asleep again in this cold, but eventually, without noticing, she would.

The second time she woke up, she'd never remember it. Mikasa would just be suddenly aware that she was burying her face into her friend's back, and she'd bring her hands up to her mouth to breathe on them but the warmth would dwindle after half an instant to be quickly replaced with that terrible cold. The two of them would shake together until she fell asleep again.

The third time, after realizing she had woken once again, she would whimper, wondering how much sleep she had been granted since the last time, and how much longer it would be until morning came to save her.

She'd scream to herself, not again, this was getting ridiculous, now she had to fall asleep all over again, but she was shaking so much that she’d wonder how she could, and instead she'd start thinking about how long until dawn and the coffee shops started to open and how much she would give just to sit inside for a while. And she'd close her eyes again, cursing the cold, and pray that it would be over soon.

Needless to say, Mikasa hadn't had a very good night.

She had never really liked the cold.

As the season turned to winter Mikasa had to admit that they didn't have a plan. Originally they'd had heavier jackets, but Eren had traded his for food early on, Armin's had been stolen by a homeless man, and she herself had left hers back at the girl's home. It wasn't something she and Armin spoke about. It seemed neither of them could think of a solution, so neither of them wanted to address it. Besides, they had different priorities right now.

Eren was still missing. They hadn't seen any sign of him, and Mikasa had lost count of the days since they'd been separated. How long had it been...? Time seemed to slip together in late nights and day naps when they were on the road.

“Armin,” she addressed her friend as they exited the park path and rejoined the main street, which itself seemed groggy at this early hour. The sun had yet to rise but the sky was already lit with its pre-dawn light. “How long has it been?”

“Since...?” Armin mumbled. It seemed that he hadn't slept much better than her.

“Since we were separated from Eren.”

“Oh. Er...” Armin thought. He too was having trouble with his mental calendar. “I suppose it's been about three, four weeks?

“Shit,” she breathed. A whole month. The odds of finding their friend grew slimmer and slimmer each day.

But she couldn't think about that. They had to focus on the here and now, and right now that meant finding a phone book and address. There was a convenience store down the road, so they settled on that. The doorbell chimed as they entered.

There were no customers there, just a single golden-haired employee shuffling around boxes of cigarettes behind the counter. Armin walked up to the front, but Mikasa hung back.

“Um, hi.”

The girl's face as she turned to look toward the counter was pallid and unamused. Armin almost felt bad for disturbing her. She was obviously also affected by the early hour, he thought somewhat bitterly that she had probably had the good fortune of spending last night in a warm bed.

“What's up?”

“Do you have a phone book I could use? All of the other ones, er...” he gestured to the front of the store. “They're all torn up and shredded, so I can't read them properly...”

Wordlessly, the clerk bent down and disappeared briefly behind the counter before reemergingholding a thick yellow book. She dropped it on the counter and spun it to face Armin, then turned back to the cigarettes.

Armin flipped it over to the first page and quickly found the first eatery, memorizing the street number.

“Excuse me,” he said, bothering the clerk once again. “Do you know how I would get here?” he pointed to the entry. Adulla's, on Liberty.

“Yeah, just keep on down this street 'til you get to Clearmont, walk about fifteen minutes to Folard, and Liberty's just off there. That everything?”

“Yes, thank you very much.”

The girl grunted in response. “Good. See you then.” She glanced over Armin's shoulder. “And don't think I didn't notice your friend stealing.”

Armin was sure his face was white as a sheet as he turned to leave.

After they were out of sight of the store, Mikasa unzipped her backpack and pulled out two bags of potato sticks. She proudly held one out to her companion.

“She saw you shoplifting.”

The girl's eyes widened and she leaned in, lowering her voice to match his, and walked a little faster. “Do you think she'll call the cops?” Her eyes warily searched up and down the street for any signs of trouble, but the only forms of life were an old woman and a yappy dog.

Armin thought for a moment. The girl hadn't shouted, hadn't said anything earlier. Maybe it was just the morning, but she didn't seem to care very much. “I don't think she will. She did let us leave,” he offered.

Mikasa relaxed and nodded, shoving a handful of potato sticks into her mouth. Armin looked down at his own bag and sighed.

Mikasa swallowed and turned to her friend. “What's wrong?”

Armin stared at the sidewalk as it ran underneath their feet. _Left, right, left, right, left, right._ “It's just...when was the last time we had our own food? I mean like, that we didn't steal?”

Mikasa contemplated. It had been a while. It was always hard to count the days, but most of the little money they'd had been spent on warm drinks other small necessities. They knew from experience that their money would dry up pretty quickly, yet they'd only managed to come up with barely enough money for a bus ride out of town before they left.

“Why? Are you worried about it being bad?” Armin didn't reply, so she continued.

“We have to choose between taking what we need and suffering while someone else sits pretty with more than they could possibly need. We make our decision. It's not wrong. I know I've said it before, but we have no choice.”

She stopped, hesitating for a moment before stepping into an alleyway. “It's steal or go hungry. Kill or be killed. Okay, well, not that extreme. But other people have a lot. They have things they can spare.” Her speech was paused as she climbed onto a dumpster and reached up to a clothesline strung between the buildings. Deftly, she plucked a bit of fabric between her fingers and pulled down a black sweater, then did the same with a long blue scarf. She threw them both down to Armin. “Us, we don't have things. We have to live day to day. There's no telling when our next meal will be, or where it will come from, so we have to take whatever we can get our hands on. We don't even have a home.” She jumped down, looking her friend in the eyes, and she knew he understood. “All we have is each other.”

 

 

 

 

 

In truth, there wasn't much to clean. Levi's apartment was pretty spotless. Still, Eren did his best to contribute. He insisted on cleaning up after their meals, or doing laundry (which Levi had tried to deter him from after the first time ended with a flooded laundry room, but Eren was steadfast), or running the groceries (for which Levi left strict instructions and often ended in multiple trips), but most of Eren's time alone was still spent at the diner, waiting, in vain, for his friends.

For every day that they didn't show up, Eren grew more desperate and hopeless. Levi could see it in everything: the way he carried himself diminished from that confident stride that bordered on arrogance and became more worried and lost. The boy's fire was still there, his excitement simply to be alive, but was tinted with an overpowering restlessness. Had Levi been younger and not seen some of the things he had seen, he would have pained for the boy, but as it was now he still felt Eren's anxiety. How terrible it must be not to know whether or not you were truly alone. It wasn't the possibility that was excruciating; that little bit of hope was the cruelest part.

Levi shook his head and silently scolded himself. Things were not that so dire, and there was no need to be so poetically melodramatic. He rolled his eyes at himself.

Though he was reluctant to admit it, Levi was glad for Eren's company. He wasn't much of an extrovert, and while he enjoyed a quiet life, he had to admit that it did get a little dull, even lonely at times. Eren's fearsome attitude and apparent domestic incompetence kept Levi on his toes.

Right now Eren stood at the sink elbows-deep in soap bubbles. Levi couldn't tell if the boy was being so thorough because he was trying to please him or because he legitimately hated every speck of dirt as if it were an affront on this holy Earth. Either way, as Levi read the morning paper, he had to admire the kid's work ethic.

“Done,” he announced. Levi detected a minute note of pride in his voice as he put the last dish on the drying rack.

“About damn time.” He stood up and tossed Eren his jacket at which he grimaced upon catching with his still-wet hands. “Let's get going.”

 

 

 

 

_Don't get your hopes up. They probably won't be there._

Eren quietly tried to quell his mind as he walked the way to the diner. Normally his pace would quicken after each failed attempt, but today he had to restrain himself as Levi made the journey beside him in silence.

Eren glanced sideways to his host. His steps were slightly shorter and therefore quicker to compensate, and it somehow made Eren feel a little bad for being taller. Levi stared straight ahead, his eyes hazy and lost in thought, and Eren caught a whiff of some weirdly appealing cologne or perfume (though Eren didn't know why he wore it, because he didn't go out very often... or maybe he just naturally smelled like that?).

He hadn't realized how effective a distraction Levi was. Eren had never noticed how many details he'd picked up of the man, seeing as he wasn't one to pay much attention to anything. He sighed as the swarm of thoughts returned to his mind.

“Can you stop fucking sighing please?”

“Sorry.” Eren apologized sheepishly.

Levi sighed, and flinched after realizing what he had just done. “Either they'll be there or they won't. If they are, then good, if they aren't, we'll come back tomorrow.”

Him, Armin, and Mikasa had been separated for a long time now. He knew that they would find each other again, no matter how long it took, but Eren was beginning to worry that something had happened to them. He wrestled with the thought sprouting in his mind that perhaps they were caught, or hurt, or worse, and that he'd never see them again. He'd have nowhere to go and little to live for...

He bit his lip to subdue his growing panic and forced his attention back to the sidewalk in front of him.

He really didn't have a plan, though, if he couldn't find them. What was he going to do, live on Levi's couch for the rest of his life? Not that Eren would mind. He really liked Levi, and he eternally grateful for the kindness and generosity he had shown Eren, but he couldn't overstay his welcome like that. He was at an utter loss for what to do, so everything hinged on finding them.

And he missed them. He missed them a lot. He'd give anything to see them. Warm beds and hot food were nothing compared to Armin and Mikasa.

Eren's hope, irrational as he told himself it was, flared up again as the diner came into sight. It had become routine now: search outside first for Armin's gold hair and Mikasa's blackest black, do it again as he stepped into the diner, then settle down, order a hot chocolate, and wait for a few hours. Eren felt a rush as they neared it now, his eyes glued to the few people standing or smoking outside, thoroughly comparing each and every one to the memory of his friends.

His pace quickened as his focus settled on two hooded individuals. One of them had their back turned to them, and he couldn't make out the exact colour of their hair, but the way they held themselves gave him hope.

One of them seemed to notice him, and smiled. He could _swear_ that was Armin's hoodie they were wearing, but nonetheless he held fast, not wanting to build it up only to be disappointed, but _damn_ his heart was racing, it _had_ to be them...

The other figure turned around and Eren almost broke down right there. It was Mikasa, and though she was dishevelled and there were dark bags under her eyes, she had never looked more beautiful than she did now. Armin was the same. His warm, tired grin cleaved Eren's heart straight in half. Armin's laugh and Mikasa shouting his name were the sweetest sounds he had ever heard. His heart overflowed with joy as they yanked him into a bear hug, all of them giggling and crying and unable to form words.

Mikasa tried to speak, but she was constantly interrupted by her own bubbly laughs so she settled for just burying her face in Eren's shoulder. Armin spoke in her stead.

“We couldn't find you,” his voice wavered as he spoke next to Eren's ear. “We looked through three cities and there was no sign of you.”

“Yeah.” Mikasa's voice was muffled by Eren's jacket. “We were so worried.”

“I was worried about you too,” said Eren. “I thought something happened. I was so scared we wouldn't meet up,” he sniffed. “I'm so glad you're here.”

“We missed you.”

It was another couple minutes before any of them could talk. They simply stood in their embrace together until it was safe to break apart, still laughing and smiling at each other.

“Armin! I missed your birthday, I'm so sorry.”

“It's okay.” he grinned at his friend. “Are you alright? You're not hurt, are you?”

“No, I'm fine. What about you two?”

“Ha! We're good too, but geez, Mikasa nearly-”

“Who's that?” Mikasa interrupted. She squinted over Eren's shoulder, eyeing his companion distrustfully.

Eren glanced behind him to see Levi standing a little ways down the sidewalk, watching them.

“Oh, his name is Levi...” How could he sum up Levi? “He's cool. He's been letting me live on his couch.”

Mikasa grabbed her friend roughly by the shoulder. “What does he want from you? Has he been weird? Was he insistent on you coming home? Has he tried to get you drunk? Did he make you do _things_?”

“No!” _Quite the opposite._ “He's nice! He didn't ask for anything. I think he just felt bad, he wanted to help.”

Mikasa still glared at the man, who seemed to be staring back blankly. “I don't trust it, but...if you say so.”

“I should probably go talk to him... I'll be right back.”

Eren jogged over to where the older man stood awkwardly shifting from side to side. He straightened up as Eren approached.

“Hey,” Eren greeted him. “Um...”

“What are you going to do now?”

“I don't really know,” the boy admitted. Levi seemed unsurprised. “We'll have to discuss it. I'm sure we'll figure something out.”

Levi contemplated for a moment. “Look, why don't you come back to my place and talk it over? It's not like you're going anywhere tonight.”

“But you've already let me stay-”

“Don't be ridiculous. You obviously don't have any other plans right now.”

Eren nodded. “Okay.” He began to turn back, then stopped himself. “Thank you.”

Levi simply grunted and watched as Eren ran back to talk to his friends. He wasn't sure why it meant so much to him, but he knew he had to help these kids out somehow. He sighed, then smirked again at his own hypocrisy.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Recommended Listening: **I Love You - Said the Whale**
> 
>  
> 
> _You're kind of sad but I love you, you're kind of rough but I love you_


	6. Story Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The trio is grateful to be reunited and goes back to Levi's for a moment of respite. Needless to say, he's kind of an awkward host.

They clung to each other as they walked, their nerves grounded by the physical contact, as if they were afraid that they might suddenly be ripped apart at any moment. Excitedly they recounted their respective journeys. Eren seemed lighter than he had in the past few weeks Levi had known him, like there was a weight lifted from his shoulders: the way he walked, his inflections, everything seemed lighthearted now. Levi himself skulked behind them, giving them space but listening quietly.

The trio was now sitting in Levi's front room, their giddy voices rising over each other with giggles and gasps and _oh my god_ 's as they recounted their stories, some exaggerated and some needing no embellishment at all.

“Please tell me this isn't going where it's going right now.”

Armin ignored Eren's interruption and continued telling his story. “-And, to my unspeakable horror, she starts running and leaps _off the freakin' building_ -”

“No. No _fucking_ way. I can't believe you,” he turned to Mikasa. Her face was composed as Armin spoke but she couldn't resist a small, daring smile. She shrugged indifferently. “It worked, didn't it?”

“Barely.” spat Armin.

Eren shook his head, speechless. “What were you thinking? You could have died!”

“I almost did.” Armin muttered.

“But we were fine! We made it.” She crossed her arms defensively and avoided Eren's gaze. “I had to do something. It wasn't even that far. They would have caught us, and like hell I'm going back.” She looked back at Eren. He stared at her hard with disapproving eyes, and eventually she sighed. “I know it wasn't the best idea...”

He shook his head and sighed as well, pausing a moment before letting a wry smile spread across his face. “Stupid or not, that's fucking amazing. Where the hell did you get that craziness?”

She smiled back at him. “No idea, Mister Joyride.”

“Anyways!” Armin interjected, bringing them back to point. “Somehow, we don't die, even though I fell an entire story below Mikasa and pretty much broke my jaw-”

“-And I had to run down and haul him back up onto the balcony. Every second felt like an eternity. Then we duck inside this open window to hide, right? And we think we're good, but then on the other side of the room there's this guy-”

“The same guy from the streetcar.”

“Was it?”

“Yeah, I remember his hair.”

“Right. He had this shitty haircut, and I swear to God I thought he was going to yell to the pig outside but he didn't so we just kind of stood there and stared at each other for like eight years. It was so awkward.”

“This other guy walked in too and it was like, 'Great, cool, join the awkward party.'”

“Yeah, then we just ran.” She gestured to Armin. “He broke down after and couldn't stop laughing.”

“Oh, man, it was terrible.” he shook his head. “Just terrible.”

Eren took the lull as an opportunity to look up at Levi. The older man was leaning awkwardly on the banister on the other side of the room, hovering uncertainly away from the group with a mug of tea in his hand.

Eren smiled at him. “Are you gonna sit down?”

Levi grunted and strode over to the vacant armchair diagonal from where Eren was sitting on the couch. Though they tried to hide it, Levi could feel Armin and Mikasa's discomfort about him. They were slow to trust strangers. Reasonable, he thought, for what they'd gone through.

He ignored the tension.

Armin spoke once again. “So what about you, Eren? You've yet to tell us about what's happened to you. Where were you?”

The young man fidgeted nervously under the weight of everyone's attention. His eyes flickered around and rested on Levi.

He exhaled, looking for a place to start. “Well... oh man, it felt like an eternity. We were separated by the train. I thought 'okay, well we've been separated before, so I'll just get off at the next stop, find a phone book, and wait for them'. So I did that, waited for a couple days... but you didn't show up. I figured you'd moved on, so I did the same.

“I managed to hitchhike a ride from some lady and her dog, this huge Saint Bernard mix, who said they were going on a road trip. I asked where she was going and she said wherever the road took them. She didn't have a job right then, no obligations, so she had no reason to stay put in one place. 'Wanderers don't sit around', she said they can't, they have to wander. I asked her, why don't you want to stay at home? She laughed at me, and said, 'Boy, my home is wherever I am, and where _he_ is,' and she pointed at her dog. Eugh, that thing smelled, but his fur was really soft.

“She asked me where I was going. I said I was on a trip too and I was meeting up with some people. The ride only took about half an hour, so I thanked her and left.

“Er, after that I was just kind of walking around. I didn't want to go too far from where we were separated. But that ended up being a lot farther than I thought.”

Eren paused for a moment and shook his head. It wasn't a pleasant time for him to revisit. “It hadn't really occurred to me that I could've gone very far on that train. It didn't seem that long, and I don't think I fell asleep...it felt like that sort of half-trance state, light doze, right before you fall asleep, where your mind starts chasing weird thoughts like they're been untethered from your normal ones, like dogs let off their leashes. The trip felt manageable. But once I split from that lady I picked up a road map at some cheap-ass convenience store to take a look at where I was, and man, I felt like a weight dropped in my skull. I was nowhere near where I started. I was so far gone. All that hope, all that keeping myself together, it just broke. I broke. I feel stupid because it wasn't even that long but I...I just felt so overwhelmed and... and isolated. I didn't know anything, or anyone in that town, I didn't even know the name of the street I was on. It didn't even have a train stop. I just jumped out because it came to a stop on the rails. How was I supposed to get back?

“I stumbled out into an alleyway and cried, cried for I don't know how long. I fell down and sobbed into my hands like a little bitch. And I haven't cried since...yeah. I didn't know what to do. I felt so stupid. I thought about turning myself in. At least I would be somewhere familiar, and I would have a chance at seeing you again.”

Eren took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, composing himself. “I fell asleep after that... I loitered around town trying to figure out what to do. I kept an eye on the train tracks in case there was one going back where I came from. That was what I held on to, getting another train back. There was a lot of time to kill in between. I did get beat up once, by a group of guys who were bored, apparently. It wasn't even bad, though. I've had way worse at home so it was hardly anything.

“I felt a lot better after I got a train back. It felt like the last four days had just accumulated, and all the frustration and helplessness and stupidness just sort of... unwound. Maybe it was the rhythm of the wheels or finally being somewhere that felt safe, but that was the first time I'd slept since the first night. It was erratic and I woke up a lot, but it was still unbelievably nice. I must have slept past the original train stop or maybe the train just took a different route, but I ended up here, at Levi's trainyard.”

Levi swirled the leftover tea in his mug as the story wrapped up. The others were silent. Mikasa was biting her lip, trying to maintain her composure.

Armin's eyes were trained on the feet of the coffee table. “Sounds like a rough time.” he said sympathetically. He flicked his eyes up to examine Eren's face.

“Yeah,” the young man agreed, not meeting his friend's eyes. Levi thought he looked forlorn, lost in memory. It was a dangerous thing.

“It's so good to be back together, though.” Mikasa chimed in. Her genuine smile was refreshing for Levi even after only knowing her a couple of hours.

Eren looked up, grinning at his friends with his characteristic ferocity, the destitute thoughts of his earlier hardships banished from his mind. “Yeah.” He agreed again, with more determination this time.

He turned his attention to Levi, and the others followed suit, waiting for comment.

Levi looked at each of them in turn, taking in their stories. He leaned forward and shook his head.

“You people are insane.”

Eren let out a barking laugh which was followed by an uncertain silence. That was all the reaction he got.

“So yeah,” Eren smiled grimly. “Fuckin' made it, though.”

“Yeah, you're a trooper.”

“Well,” Levi began. “I guess... it's time for the big question.”

He looked at each of them in turn, trying to gauge their reaction. Eren and Armin listened closely, and Levi could see they already knew what the question was and that they didn't have the answer. Mikasa's face was unreadable as ever.

“What are you going to do? What's next?”

“We keep going.” She piped up. “Not that it's any of your business.”

“Yeah,” agreed Armin, but he sounded unsure. “We'll get out of your hair, just as soon as-”

“And go where? That's not a proper answer. You can't say you're _just gonna keep going_ when you have no means, no supplies, and no destination. What, are you planning on making it to the fucking tropics before winter arrives?”

“It's not that cold.”

“People on the streets _die_ from being out in the cold. I know because I've pried them out of the snowbanks. There's a lot between here and there, and you'd get stuck before you made it out of the state. Look at what's happened already; if you've done this as many times as Eren's said you have then you know all the shit that _will_ go wrong. Be real.”

“Well what else are we gonna do?” said Eren.

“We'll face it.” Mikasa said. “We take that risk. We'll get through whatever comes at us, we always-”

“It only takes one time, one fuck-up to ruin that, and you're left with nothing. Worse than nothing.”

“People start from nothing all the time.” Armin rested his chin on his fists, sorting intently through his thoughts for options. “If we find a place to stay... we could squat somewhere. Then we could pull some odd jobs, or get it under the table...”

“Until you need papers, or get murdered by druggies for infringing on their territory. How often do you think those people who start from nothing end in anything other than more fucking nothing?”

Levi sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. That last part wasn't completely true, he knew, but he had no idea if he was getting through to them, if they thought he was any different from every other nameless stranger who had ever tried to tell them what was best for them. “Look,” he said. “I'm not trying to convince you to stop or to go home. I just want to know what the fuck you think you're going to do with your lives.”

All three of them were silent.

Eren opened his mouth only to close it again a moment later, unable to find words with which to break the tension in the room.

He didn't have to. As if to punctuate, there was a knock at the door.

“Oh, for _fuck's sake..._ ”

Levi jumped to his feet and crossed the floor in one swift movement, swinging the front door open violently.

“Hi Levi!” Levi's tall, bespectacled landlord leaned in the doorway and smiled. “Hi Evan!”

Eren smiled sheepishly and waved back.

“His name is Eren, Hanji.”

“Yes, yes it is, that's what I said isn't it?” Hanji suddenly seemed to notice the other two set of eyes watching them.

“Oh wow, you got more. Did they multiply? It must be mitosis.”

“Yes, must have been. I came home one day and there were more. I'm thinking of starting a circus. Did you come for the rent?”

“Mhmm!”

Levi retreated momentarily farther into his house and retrieved a thin white envelope that he proceeded to hand to Hanji.

“Alright! Well that's it so I'll see you-”

“Hanji,” Levi interrupted.

Hanji cocked their head to the side, waiting for him to continue.

Levi drew another breath. “No one's using the basement, right?”

“Nope.”

“I'd like to rent it out this month.”

“Sure thing.” Hanji nodded in agreement. “Just go ahead and we'll sort everything out once I get back. Same rate, same rules. Don't ruin my house, copper.”

“Yup. Don't let your chickens die while you're away, crazy loon.”

They glared at him through the rims of their glasses. “Petra's feeding them. Anyways!” They huffed. “Good day, keep warm, I'll see you in a while. Cheers!”

They bolted off just as quickly as they'd appeared. Levi shut the door behind them and turned to the silent teens. The other two watched guardedly, but when his gaze fell on Eren he just stared back expectantly.

“You can move your shit into the basement. There should already be bedding down there.”

“W-Wait,” Eren stuttered. “You can't do that! We have no way of-”

“Just until you sort things out.” Levi insisted. The other two stayed silent. They were hard to read. Levi concentrated his experience in an attempt to read surprise or suspicion, hope or relief that they might have been trying to hide, but unsuccessful he just turned back to Eren. “It can't hurt. I'm sure you would appreciate a good night's sleep.”

The last remark was directed at Armin and Mikasa. The reality of the situation seemed to be sinking in. They were still unsure, but Levi could see their excitement beginning to bleed through their façade.

“Are you sure?” Armin asked tentatively. “It's a lot for us to ask.”

“You're not asking. I'm offering. Now, there's a shower downstairs because frankly you both smell like gutter rats and if you even want to think about eating dinner like civilized beings then you better come out of there smelling like angel farts. Go on, then.”

Levi glanced over to see Eren grinning at him. He glared in return, but Eren saw something tug at the corner of his mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been busy busy busy lately but can't stop won't stop writing
> 
> Next chapter up soon! Someone's gonna show up! Who will it be? (hint: it's Annie)
> 
> Also went back and fixed Hanji's pronouns in the earlier chapters.
> 
> Listen: **Team The Best Team - Doomtree**
> 
>  
> 
> _Leave 'em alone, how we livin? Very own road and it's so, so driven, in the freezing cold y'all keep chillin... we'll leave tracks you can follow in_


End file.
